Helicopter Parents… Are you one?
I just read an article (www.gvparent.com) that defines a term I did not know
Helicopter Parent: a parent who pays extremely close attention to their child’s experiences, often rushing in to prevent any failure from befalling them and will not let the child learn from their own mistakes. These parents micromanage their kid’s life even as the child gets older and often against the child’s own wishes.
WOW. It is so hard to not be a parent that helicopters but is it also so critical for your child to learn in the safety of your home. No one wants the first failure your child experiences to be when they are a grown up and fail at a job. Children do need to learn to be confident in their own capabilites. It is so easy to fall into this trap, especially if you are working at home with a on line business for women.
Suggestions to help if you find yourself helicoptering.
* ask yourself “Will failure with this task really hurt my child?”
* ask yourself “Did my child ask for help?”
* LISTEN to your child
* teach your children how to make good decisions on their own
* Give your child choices, and abide by them
* Give your child your full attention
What tips do you have with this issue?
Tags: Being Involved in your Child's Education, For Moms, Raising Children
August 28th, 2009 at 9:51 pm
Another aspect of being an overbearing parent, is the effect this can have on the child’s teacher! I came across an interesting site telling educators how to cope with “helicopter parents” who hover right into the classroom!
http://educationalissues.suite101.com/article.cfm/helicopter_parents_land
August 28th, 2009 at 9:55 pm
So true! I found myself “hovering” when my kids were little, just on certain things, but boy did I regret it in the “tween” stage.
I then watched that movie “Because I Said So”, that really hit me what I did NOT want to become!
I really find it hard not to step in and keep them from getting hurt, but I remind myself they need to make their own mistakes. Better while Im still around to give advice and help with the learning process, than later when they are off to college. And to keep me from being “that mother”!
Thanks we could all use the reminder!
September 1st, 2009 at 12:26 am
I believe the most important thing is to make sure that your child is safe. I think it’s good to learn how to deal with disappointment and hardships. That’s part of life! But there are definately some things no child should have to go through. I remember going off as a child early in the morning and being back by dinner. Nothing bad ever happened, and I learned a lot of independance. Unfortunately, I feel that times have changed a bit, so we have to try to find that happy medium in life. Personally, I feel that this “happy medium” is much easier to find when I’m able to be at home with my Women’s Dream Team home based business.
October 2nd, 2009 at 7:32 am
A favorite tip that I learned early in my children’s lives was that a parent’s job is actually to manifest situations where a child can learn to fail. If I can view each of their little objections as an opportunity for LIFE to teach them the rules, instead of lecturing, I can stand back and observe how they handle it. Afterwards, we can sit down together and discuss the outcome. In this way they see the laws of choices and consequences in action.